Is That a New Hairstyle? Rediscovering the Beauty of Your Natural Curls and Coils!
When a Simple Change in My Hair Routine Started a Conversation About Natural Hair Confidence
By Lady Carolyn M. Summerset
Crowning Glory — Coils & Kinks
Originally published November 5, 2013 | Refreshed October 2026
Hello, my beautiful Curl Friends! 💕
Have you ever changed something about your hair—not necessarily getting a haircut or trying a completely different style—but simply adjusting your products or styling technique, only to have someone stop and ask:
“Is that a new hairstyle?”
Well, ladies, that is exactly what happened to me!
And would you believe that two different women asked me that very question within approximately fifteen minutes?
I had to stop and think about what I had actually done differently! LOL!
But what began as a conversation about my curls turned into something much more meaningful: a reminder that every woman deserves to feel beautiful and confident wearing the hair God gave her.
Two Women, One Question
I remember riding the train when I noticed a woman sitting across from me. Every so often, she would look in my direction.
At first, I couldn't figure out why.
Finally, she asked, “Is that a new hairstyle?”
She explained that she had never seen my hair looking quite that way before.
Naturally, I began telling her about the changes I had made to my routine.
As our conversation continued, she shared something that caught my attention. She admired the definition of my curls but felt frustrated with her own natural hair. She described her texture as difficult to manage and expressed a desire for her curls to look like mine.
Ladies, I wanted her to understand something important.
Her hair did not have to look like mine to be beautiful.
Every texture has its own personality. Some curls form little spirals, others create beautiful waves, and some coils form delicate zigzags or springy patterns.
There is no single definition of beautiful natural hair.
And Then It Happened Again!
Not long afterward, another woman approached me while I was waiting near a streetlight.
Once again, the question came:
“Is that a new hairstyle?”
This woman was wearing beautiful Havana twists.
As we talked, she shared that she admired my curl pattern and wished her natural hair had a different texture.
I found myself encouraging her, just as I had encouraged the first woman.
Her twists were beautiful. Her natural texture was beautiful. And neither needed to become something else to deserve appreciation.
That second conversation reminded me how easily we sometimes overlook the beauty of our own crown while admiring someone else's.
What Had I Done Differently?
At the time, I was experimenting with my natural hair routine.
On October 15, 2013, I had returned to a styling approach known as the Tightly Curly Method, which emphasizes working conditioner through the hair in sections and encouraging the natural curl pattern to form.
My hair is a mixture of 3C and 4A curls and coils, and I had discovered that careful product application, patience, and consistency made a noticeable difference in how my curls looked and felt.
Here is the routine I was using during that period.
My Original 2013 Natural Hair Routine
Step 1: Co-washing
I began by cleansing my hair with TRESemmé Naturals conditioner.
Step 2: Conditioning
I reapplied conditioner as part of my styling process.
Step 3: Adding Leave-In Conditioner
Next, I used Alikay Naturals Lemongrass Leave-In Conditioner, a product I enjoyed using at the time.
Step 4: Applying Oil
I followed with Alikay Naturals Emu Oil.
Step 5: Finishing With a Moisturizing Cream
Finally, I applied Alikay Naturals Shea Moisturizing Cream.
These were the products I used in 2013, not a requirement for achieving defined curls today. Hair products and formulations can change, and different textures respond differently to ingredients.
The Styling Technique That Made a Difference
After applying my products, I separated my hair into manageable sections.
Beginning at the back of my head, I worked through each section using my fingers to encourage the curls to form naturally.
The Tightly Curly Method described this process as doodling.
For me, it involved gently smoothing and twirling small groups of strands until my curls began to take shape.
It required patience—sometimes forty-five minutes to an hour—but I enjoyed the definition it gave my hair.
The secret wasn't necessarily buying another expensive product.
It was learning how to work with the curls I already had!
Keeping My Wash-and-Go Beautiful Throughout the Week
During that period, I generally refreshed my hair according to its needs rather than starting over every morning.
I paid particular attention to three things:
Moisture: Using enough water-based conditioning product to help my strands remain soft and manageable.
Gentle handling: Avoiding unnecessary brushing, pulling, and constant manipulation after styling.
Nighttime protection: Using satin to reduce friction while sleeping and help preserve my curl definition.
Over time, I learned that my routine did not need to be complicated. It needed to be consistent and appropriate for my hair.
For more ideas, read my article 10 Ways to Keep Your Natural Hair Moisturized.
Curl Definition Is Not the Same as Hair Health
One lesson I want to emphasize today is that defined curls are beautiful, but they are not the only sign of healthy hair.
A woman can have soft, healthy natural hair with plenty of frizz, shrinkage, or a less uniform curl pattern.
And that is perfectly fine!
Hair health is better evaluated by factors such as manageable breakage, scalp comfort, flexibility, and how well the hair tolerates everyday care.
Some of us have tightly coiled strands. Others have loose curls. Many of us have several textures growing from the same scalp.
If you're still learning about your texture, visit What Does 3C and 4A Natural Hair Really Look Like?.
Remember, ladies: Your hair does not have to imitate anyone else's to be worthy of admiration.
Learning What Works for Your Own Crown
Looking back on those two conversations, I realize that the most meaningful part wasn't that my hair received compliments.
It was the opportunity to encourage two other women to appreciate their own natural beauty.
There is nothing wrong with admiring someone else's hairstyle or trying a technique that works for them.
But there is a difference between being inspired by another woman's curls and believing your own curls are somehow less beautiful.
The best natural hair routine is not always the trendiest or most expensive one.
It is the routine that helps you care for your strands comfortably and consistently.
If you're interested in developing your own definition routine, take a look at The Ultimate 3C & 4A Wash-and-Go: Beautiful Curl Definition Without All the Frizz!.
Let's Talk, Ladies!
Have you ever received a compliment about your natural hair that surprised you?
Have you ever admired another woman's curls and wondered how she achieved her style?
Or have you finally discovered a routine that works beautifully for your own unique texture?
I'd love to hear about it in the comments!
Until next time, remember:
Your texture is your signature. Your curls are your expression. And your crown deserves to be celebrated!
Happy Curls to You! 💕🌸
Lady Carolyn M. Summerset
Crowning Glory — Coils & Kinks
© 2026 Crowning Glory — Coils & Kinks by Lady Carolyn M. Summerset. All Rights Reserved. No part of this publication may be reproduced, distributed, or republished without prior written permission of the author.
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We, whatever texture, type, fine, coarse, short, or long, must learn to wear our Crowning Glory with great honor!
Happy Curls to You!
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